A friend of mine recently downloaded Crackdown from Games On Demand. I remembered dabbling with this way back in the day, so I decided to take a quick look to see how many achievements I’d managed to pull. Imagine my disgust when I found out that I’d not popped a single one. Of course I immediately headed to Xbox Live to download the game and leap back into the action. I immediately regretted my decision…
Don’t get me wrong, Crackdown is brilliant fun, especially on co-op. There’s nothing quite so chucklesome as “accidentally” kicking a dear friend over the side of a thirty storey building. But there’s an achievement lurking amidst all the bouncy, shooty, blowy-uppy action which is about as much fun as an acid enema.
The achievement in question is High Flyer; for climbing The Keep. The Keep being the Agency HQ where you start your Crackdown career. So, to try and save you some of the pain which I experienced, here are a few pointers.
1) You’re not getting it yet.
The first thing you want to do when you fire up the game is start leaping and bounding your way to the top of that tower. You want to do that, I know, but you can’t. Sorry, but it’s not happening just yet. Instead, you’re going to want to build up your agility skill.
You can do this by collecting Agility and/or Hidden Orbs, or by completing Rooftop Races. You can also up your agility by killing people from a great height, so my advice would be to scoop up a sniper rifle, climb the nearest multi-storey car park and make like a deranged postal worker. You can do it with three star agility, but it’s easier with four. Plus, hitting four star agility will pop the “Agency Athlete” achievement, so why the hell not?
2) Get your climbing shoes on.
And so we begin. There’s no exact route to the first part of the building, just jump from ledge to ledge until you’d swear you’d gone as far as you could possibly go. Seriously, when you reach a point where you’re wandering around on a small platform screaming “WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME YOU SADISTIC GAME GIT!?”, you’re partway there.
The next step is to look for a scaffold, a series of very, very small platforms and difficult to grab bars. Yes, of course you’re going to climb it and if you’re anything like me you’ll be muttering something along the lines of:
“OK, jump. No, jump UP. On to the ledge. On to the OHGODINHEAVENWHYMISSEDITGOINGTO oh he’s grabbed the ledge. Phew. Ok, time for another attempt ANDHEHASMISSEDAGAINOHHELLOHHELLOHHELL nope landed a couple platforms down. OK, one last WHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY”
…and then you set fire to the controller and run away screaming.
After a few failed attempts, you’ll make it up the scaffold and reach a kind of observation post, with a flight of stairs on each side. From there you can leap onto a platform and then a walkway. Or, if you prefer, you can do what I did and jump from the wrong side, inventing new swear words on the trip to the hard, hard ground below. Then you can regenerate and start all over again. Your choice.
Once you hit walkway, you’ll notice it connects the building you are on to the much, much taller building which is your ultimate destination. Fling yourself screaming from the walkway, hopefully landing on the other building. Now, find two pipes which jut from the wall, running all the way to the top. Found them? See those tiny, tiny brackets holding them to the wall. There’s your hand and footholds.
Why are you crying? Now jump off.
3) NOT THAT WAY!
Sorry, should have mentioned this sooner. There’s a second achievement, Base Jumper, for hurling yourself from the top of The Keep and landing in the water. Of course, jump off THAT side and your landing will certainly involve fluid, just none that should be seen outside of your body.
4) There’s a what?
By the by, there’s a Rooftop Race which involves climbing to the top of The Keep. Something else I should have mentioned sooner, huh?
Well the hell with it, because I only found out about it when I’d already climbed, fallen from, climbed, fallen from and climbed the damn building time and time again. So, want those Rooftop Races completed? Up you go.
I fell from that building so many times that I was on first name terms with the assorted office workers who would watch me scream past their window on a regular basis. Jill on the seventh floor is lovely. But persevere and eventually you’ll reach the top. Bloop.
Personally, I’m off to work on my “Really Long Ladder” game mod.
Check out Jamie’s previous Achievement Punting escapades as he puts his sanity to the test each week by clicking here.